I Just Want To Get Back Out There

So I’ve been reading some post from a blogger called Seriously Single In Sydney and Im so jealous of their dating life! I just wanna get back out there and date and be treated all cute and stuff. The worst thing is the last “date” I went on with this Zach and it was super cute. We went to a dessert parlour which he paid for…its pretty cheap but it was a nice guested (though I did have a bitch about how I spend money to go and see him and stuff.) But anyways I got a waffle and he got apple pie and we shared a milkshake. He’s so confused the milkshake came with one straw and he looked like he was have kittens…he was like “we need another straw” I just laughed and said “I’ve had worse in my mouth than your saliva.” Silly boy…I’ve had his penis in my mouth !!

But it was cute and then we left and went back to his and got into bed…yes we had sex. It wasn’t as passionate as the time before but this time I decided to kiss him and he kissed me back! I was so worried that he was gonna pull away or something. But nope. I guess always it was very passionate cos I was on top most of the time, which was new! After 1 year and 4 months of sexing I was on top for more than 5 minutes!

So after I tried to play it cool but he just stayed on top of me for a while then rolled over and made me cuddle him. WHY DOES HE KEEP DOING THAT. Then we started talking just about stuff and about having kids and marriage. And I remember he was so against getting married when we started seeing each other and then he said that one day he would want to! Who is the bitch that changed his mind. Then I said I wouldn’t want to have his babies and he was like “why do you keep hurting my feelings” and I was like “do you want me to have your kids?” and he gave me this weird look and said “I don’t deserve for you to have my children” and then went back to normal and said “and I’m not ready for kids anyway.” SO MUCH MIND FUCK!!!

It’s those kind of things that make me wanna stick around and see what happens between us, cos sometimes I really do think that we might get back together but then I think really. I just wish I had met him after uni…I think it would have worked out.

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