The End??

So Zack came to see me on Saturday…he took a day of work to come and see and then surprised me by saying he wasn’t coming when he actually did. It was so great we made meatballs together, baked a cake. Did loads of cut couple things. We had some really great sex, he used one of my vibrators on me which was kinky hehe.

But then I ruined it by crying and looking through his phone. Basically I compared to him one of our flat mates ( a guy) and he was like don’t make me compare you to Tia (the guys girlfriend) cos you’re not gonna like what I say. And I should have known he was joking but I took it to heart cos she’s so pretty and had a nice figure and a really perky bum and then there’s me so I went to my room and sulked and I ended up crying. We ended up resolving the issue but it was still a bit awkward I guess. Then when he was in the shower getting ready to leave I went onto his phone and was just being nosy not really expecting anything and I saw some texts and he was calling this girl Sexy and shit. He said it was his cousin but yeah right…they did have the same surname though but his surname is quite popular.

So I confronted him at the train station and I ended up crying again and then after an abusive text from me he called me and said he thinks it’s best we ended it cos he just can’t take some aspects of our relationship and that he was too young and shit like that. Then he said he’d call me back the next day to properly talk about it and we did and basically he just said he doesn’t wanna hurt me and stuff cos he can see it not being a long term thing and that he doesn’t wanna try now and then 3/4 years down the line see the same thing happening and then try and break up with me then and hurt me even more.

I guess I prefer to end it early on but I wanna be with him and he claims to want to be with me he’s just too immature right now to work on working things out like you do in a real relationship…good luck to the next girl…she better be just like him…icy cold.

He said he wants to still be friends and work on himself and maybe in the future we could try again but like I don’t see us getting back together that rarely happens…people go their separate ways and that’s it no second chances. I would love to have made it work but I guess what they say is true…girls do mature faster than boys. I sent him text (it was quite long) saying we can try and be friends and see what happens…I have no plans in going to meet with him or any of that…I still love him and I need time to get over him and I think I can do that with just texting him and maybe talking to him on the phone. I value(d) his presence in my life and he’s one of the few people who cared about me properly. Unlike my flat mates who (bar one) don’t give a fuck about me or my problems…not one of them (expect Tia) has come to see how I am and so they can all go screw themselves…I’m gonna just be friendly and that’s it…I’m not gonna get involved in their problems and I will rarely speak to them…I’m spend so much time in my room doing my work…I will get that first…and proof all these fuckers wrong 😀

So I am officially single…I guess a part of me hopes he sees the error in his ways and begs for me back but right now I think I’m content with being friends

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