At A Cross Road

So as you may or may not know…my delightful boyfriend didn’t turn up to come and see me nor did he make any attempt to come down the next day but instead made a half hearted promise to come and see me in two weeks. I’m going home and so suggested that I could go and see him (me putting in all the effort) and he gave me a really pissy reply so I shortened my stay with him in response to his reply.

The next day (Monday) I wake up and I’m no longer upset but I’m so angry. Why am I the one always making the effort?!? And he said to me that if the trains fucked up again then he wouldn’t come and see me…yet he wasn’t complaining every time I went to see him in my first year yet I want him to come down and he makes up such a fuss. So I sent him a message telling him how I felt and all I get back was ‘kl’ !!! IS HE OK?!?! So I called him a dick and he didn’t reply. So I spent the entire day in bed brooding and playing sims while my lovely flatmates (bar one) spent the day ignoring me as usual. I’m so fed up of the double standards whenever anyone else is sad everyone runs to their rescue when it’s me…pft I’ll be fine..well they can all fuck off then.

So I tried to call Zack at like 1:30am (again me making the effort) and no reply. I wake up to no attempt to get hold of me whats so ever. So I (again making all the effort) send him a message saying we need to talk…it hasn’t delivered to his phone yet so now I guess it’s up to him right??

I hate this so much…I love this boy and yet I feel like it’s gonna end so cos this long distance is just driving a wedge between us 😦 sad really.


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